Missing you like crazy

Hi Jack 'n Charlie!

 I've been thinking about you both a lot this week.  My friend sent me another picture that your mom posted in Instagram.  As always, I'm amazed by how much you both have grown!

We are down in San Diego visiting with Auntie Brandi and Olive and Opal.  I hear that you're coming down here this Friday for the weekend.  You're going to be so close but I won't be able to see you.  That makes Papa very sad.

If Olive or Opal says anything about Papa or Nana I hope that you won't get your feelings hurt.  If your mother would let me, I'd be there to see you all the time.  I miss you so much.

 I hope you have fun down here.  You'll be on my mind every minute.

I love you both so much I can't even describe it.

 Papa

Another Sleepless Night

 Hi Jack & Charlie!

You boys sure have been on my mind lately.  I laid awake all night missing you and thinking about you and remembering our times together.  You'd think after all these years have gone by since I saw you or spoke with you that I'd get used to not having you in my life, but the truth is I miss you more than ever.

Nana and I have made some changes in our lives.  We are now 100% traveling in our trailer full time.  We don't have a house or storage units or extra cars that are not with us.  We quit our jobs at the RV Park in Manteca.  I'll send along a picture of our truck pulling our trailer and pulling our little white car behind that.  That's everything that we own on this earth!  I still work remotely providing document services for a number of California water systems, so I keep busy but still my time is my own.  I'd always promised you guys that I wouldn't be tied down with a job that would keep me from seeing you.  Even though your mom has kept me from seeing you for almost 5 years now, I've always kept that promise.

Another change I've talked with you about is that we get to see and spend time with Auntie Brandi, Olive and Opal.  We are seeing them more and more often, which is wonderful, but it actually makes me miss you both even more.  It's so wrong that we cannot be together, but I have no control over that.  At least not until you're 18 years old and your mom cannot keep us apart.  I only hope I live long enough and am healthy enough to see you again.

Right now we are in Hot Springs, South Dakota.  We'll be here for the next couple of months.  Then we head to San Diego for a couple of months to see Olive & Opal.  Then I think we'll go to Florida to see Nana's dad.  Then probably to Alabama to visit family there.  And then back to San Diego.  We'll plan our next destinations as we go along.

My friend sent more pictures of you guys.  I know I keep saying the same thing over and over, but you both have grown so much!  I am so proud of you both but I'm so very sad that we are apart.  I love you with all my heart and I'll never stop loving you and missing you and wishing we were together again.

I love you, Papa

 

 

Happy Birthday Charlie Bear!

 Hi Charlie!

Well, another year has passed.  I absolutely can't believe that you're nine years old today.  I was talking with Nana about that and realized that for half your life as you know it, I have not been allowed to see you or talk with you.  That sure makes me sad because I miss you so very much and I love you with all my heart and I always will.

Be that as it may, I hope you are happy and healthy.  You were such an amazing boy and I'll just bet that you're just as amazing today as you were when I last saw you.

At this point I'm just not even sure that you remember me.  You were only 4-1/2 last time I saw you.  That was when I took you and Jack bowling!  You guys loved that!

The big change in my life is that I'm in a new line of work, one that let's me travel full time just like I always wanted.  I wanted to be able to see you and care for you and enjoy you without work getting in the way.  I was already doing that, but this new venture gives me even more freedom.  I sure hope that I live long enough to reconnect with you and Jack.

The other big change has to do with Auntie Brandi.  Nana and I have spent the past two months down in San Diego reconnecting with Brandi, Olive and Opal.  It's been wonderful, but it has made me miss you and Jack all the more.  Olive and Opal will probably talk about Papa & Nana at some point when they're with you.  I hope it doesn't make you sad or think that we have chosen not to see you.  No Way!  If you're mom & dad would let us, we'd see you ALL THE TIME!  I will never give up hope in that possibility.

I love you so much, Charlie and I really do hope you have a very Happy Birthday!

Love, Papa

Jack's Birthday!

Hi Jack!

As always I'm thinking about you and Charlie today.  But today is a special day and I wanted to wish you a very Happy Birthday!  I know I keep repeating myself as the weeks and months and years go by, but it's hard to imagine that you are eleven years old today.

I wonder if your mom & dad still do a big party for you and Charlie sometime between now and his birthday in March.  Anyway, I hope you have a wonderful day today.  Today is all about you, Jack!

I think I wrote last time that Nana & I are going to San Diego with our trailer on February 1st and will be there till the end of March.  I don't know how much time I'll get to see Olive and Opal, but I'm looking forward to any time I can get.  I wish so badly that I could see you and Charlie!  Did I tell you (I probably did) that we have another trailer?  It's bigger than our other one.  If you were with us you each could have your own bed if you wanted to!

I have so many pictures of you, but mostly when you were much younger.  Except for the one's that my friend sends me of you and Charlie.  Every time she sends one I'm so excited to see you but at the same time I'm sad because of how much time I've missed out on.  I hope that somehow you haven't forgotten me and that you know in your heart that I love you and miss you and want to be with you so badly.

Well, I'm getting sad again so maybe I should wish you Happy Birthday until I write again.

I love you, Jack!  You, too my Charlie Bear!

Papa